1. |
Diane
03:16
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Diane
Quit looking at me you're making me nervous
Diane
You'd better believe you got my attention
I've been lying awake all night
Thinking of anything that I could say
When I run into you
As I seem to do
At the worst of times
I was wrong
Completely
Terrified
As if I could make this into a worse situation
I fall over myself
I violate grammar
If I made it all up
How can I make it up
to you?
Diane
Quit looking at me you're making me nervous
Diane
Taught me a few things about emasculation
You look at me and then you turn around
People bored in class find ways
To pass time
And I was getting by
By making eyes
And then yours found mine
And I thought for second
My heart had stopped completely
I found out later you used to be a Goth
And you were not surprised to find I was all grunge
But I really fell in love
when you told me about the time
That you got locked in the hallway
In a towel
On the telephone
Diane
Quit looking at me you're making me nervous
Diane
Will you be sitting with me when the thrill of alienation is gone?
You look at me and then you turn around
(Growing Pains-esque internal monologue!)
What do you want from me?
I said I was sorry...
I guess I should have found something nicer to say
instead of just repeating all the things you said to me
I've been lying awake all night
Thinking of anything that I could say
When I run into you
As I seem to do
At the worst of times
Like my whole life lately
It's been so long
Give me one more chance
To prove you wrong
I would say the same thing if everyone was looking
and I wasn't just talking to the telephone dialtone
You're freaking me out
I'm shaking like a paintstir
You're staring me down
(She had a smile that made me fail all of my classes)
Quit looking at me you're making me nervous
Diane
Quit looking at me you're making me nervous
Diane
Quit looking at me you're making me nervous
Diane
I did what I could and I got no redemption
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2. |
Don't Know Why
02:41
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I said I was sorry
Hanging out lunchtime pranks get carried away
I meant what I said
The part about your walk
Not the part about your deadbeat dog
Conflicts abound go eye to eye
She’s four foot nine and I’m six foot five
Greedy for attention
we step up
strap on
Bobby Pep brings the Bantam.
Don't know why you'd ever hang out with me
Don't know why you've never done your own thing
Contemplating while I sit by the sink
Torn by apathy and what the world thinks
Don't know why you'd ever hang out with me
Don't know why you've never done your own thing
Double meanings hand in hand with double standards
Circles of friends
Buy 'em in bulk
Get a great deal on friendship
Paste eaters as children
They were
Culturally enlightened
By 4 minute microwave karma
You thought I said I was lonely
Did I ever really say that?
I don’t think I ever said that
Mistaken identity
That curly haired miss has taken my identity
Don't know why you'd ever hang out with me
Don't know why you've never done your own thing
Contemplating while I sit by the sink
Torn by apathy and what the world thinks
Don't know why you'd ever hang out with me
Don't know why you've never done your own thing
Double meanings hand in hand with double standards
Rockin’ and a-dancin’ away
Summer well spent preparin’ for the end of the world.
Do the whiteboy
Ladies do the hop
Do the slapdance, girl
You’d better not stop stop
Stop my flow
Just be cool
Give it away, give it away, give it away now.
Bring it back
Just in time
Step out back
Shoot ‘em up
Make way for the next rhyme
Droppin’ beats baby
Cleanin’ up the dance floor
Ghetto booties movin'
You don’t need no freakin’ tootsie roll
To get this lame train movin’
You don’t need no kung-fu grip
off the fresh tip
Of my Aunt Matilda’s lip
Homegrown verses back the sounds
Running when we hit the ground
All around
Can’t be found
Anyone we will not astound.
Doing damage to your feet
With the beat we repeat,
Hand in hand
With your feet
Shot up from the funky beat
Don’t know why you’d ever hang out with me
Don’t know why you’d ever hang out with me
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3. |
Lowercase
02:39
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The words on the screen say "I Like You"
Well, Thank God, and bottoms up…
What the Hell is that supposed to mean?
Your words w/o eyes… it turns out they didn’t mean anything.
Pound this out at the Obligatory Safe Lunch,
we're taking pains to keep that lunch completely safe.
You ask about class, I ask about chemistry.
Story of my life girl, undone, put down again.
"Curses, Homonyms!"
"You don’t know what I mean,
it’s time we got it straight.
I never said that at all.
Get it straight."
I have this picture in my head
of Webster working in his lab,
devising ways to confuse,
all the way to eve of the 21st Century.
Say what you mean.
Tell me, yes or no.
"No," you really can,
or "No," you really won’t?
"You don’t know what I mean,
it’s time we got it straight.
I never said that at all.
Get it straight."
Coffee with me spelled "c-o-double’f’-e-e"
with him it’s boldface "C-O-F-F-E-E,"
(if you know what I mean).
It’s always lowercase with me.
"You don’t know what I mean,
it’s time we got it straight.
I never said that at all.
Get it straight."
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4. |
Advice To Superheroes
01:22
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if you want to fight on a train
fight on top
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5. |
Gentleman
03:33
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it never took you too long to see
the faults of others
why did it take you so long with me
kept me confused
kept me hanging around
made me your bitch
your ever-obedient hound
evil breeds
you and your friends
tear me apart with no offer for amends
people told me 'get out while you can'
now i'm surrounded
i'm surrounded
you never told me anything about a plan
for masterful destruction of your enslaved gentleman
plan in motion now before me
headed out the door
behind me people screaming
'there is nowhere to run'
leaving me stranded
among your empty promises
of something better than friendship
but we all know now you're as psycho as they come
game of chess
winner takes all
twisted twister
co-ed naked volleyball
let's play that game where we stop on the road
you push me out and i walk the last 8 miles home
tie me up and leave me all night
drive me wild
with the lead chips that you dropped in my sprite
relive the last days you were normal
in the 80s
the 1980s
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6. |
Glamour
03:53
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this song goes out
to all the good smelling girls
with the cool sounding names
do you even know
how very attractive you and your friends
have been to me
you girls all travel in packs
and intimidate while you attract
with dead on reckoning
you size up the room
assign levels of utility
and i'm not gonna make any points with you
i'm never going to be a prize in your game
but a guy's gotta hope just the same
a bed of strings
a half time frame rate
don't you know all the prettiest girls sit together
and i sit two rows back so i can see better
oh you might know my name
but you don't know who i am
and you laugh at my jokes
but you don't understand
i'm shy around girls
and try as i can
i can't separate you from your glamour
this song goes out
to the girls with the walks rehearsed
you walk on by, my conversation stops
and i get myself an eyeful
some sights are flintstone pills
and some go down easier still
parties with bad ratios
we instinctively know
which of us has potential
which of us has a chance of going home with you
and which is best for conversation
if you're looking for fat free affection
why are you always sticking with confections
who among us would not like to be brandon walsh
and have his furrowed brow and perfect curls
who among us would not like to live on spelling television
and have such delectable choices
this song goes out to the lovely ladies with the cute asthmatic voices
there ain't a place that i can go
there ain't a place anywhere in the world
that's free from beautiful girls
god save me from beautiful girls
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7. |
Grace
04:47
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a lot of things are said without a sound
as times go by those are the things that count
after conversations run together
run into doubts
you can tell a lot from someone's eyes
mine are calling you
you can't hear them at all
when the time to speak comes
i always run
where i should crawl
girl i am not so brave
to you that is not so strange
you and i are alike in many ways
if you're alone
i am alone
after all you've shown me
all i know about grace
i learned from you
now that's all i will ever know
but when you were so close
i knew i wasn't alone
in being confused
there's a reason why you don't see me around anymore
i feel like i'm invisible to you
or maybe there's a hole in me
you can look straight through
and that's how you can stand this close to me
and not see
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8. |
Not My Girlfriend
02:04
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no but thanks for asking
she is not my girlfriend
am i being clear
is there any doubt
it would not be smart to say that out loud
no but thanks for asking
she is not my girlfriend
if that's in your head
you should get it out
if she got tied down
how would she get around?
tired of being alone
she said to me
what could i do but shrug and walk
as we walked
from the 18th party we'd attended together
guess what i mean
(it might sound lame)
but what i'm looking for is best expressed
by a typical archtypical halfwit postpunk lovesong
no but thanks for asking
she is not my girlfriend
i am not out
but i'm not at home
she's not with me
but she's not alone
no but thanks for asking
she is not my girlfriend
tell the boys at fountain square for me:
you can't always get what you want
one of us has lost his mind
and since i am not a he it must be you
she said to me
and at the time
i didn't feel like i deserved that
tired of being alone
well what about me i said
or rather
what about meat
or do you like
meat
or what i was trying to say was
how about those red wings
no but thanks for asking
she is not my girlfriend
if that's in your head
you should get it out
if she got tied down
how would she get around?
no but thanks for asking
she is not my girlfriend
for about 5 weeks
she's thought something's wrong
but i've been in love
for almost twice that long
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9. |
Superpowers
03:31
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never been audited
always been credited
always has perfect change
always gets straight a's
already a winner
ed mcmahaon has her number
older school than hammer
he never could hurt her
5 time jeopardy champion
beat ben stein out with an 8 out of 10
the jedi newsletter
the special report
yoda's saying that this child has the force
she's got superpowers
the likes of which you've never seen
she can vaporize her enemies
with a twitch a cold stare or a sneeze
maybe you've seen her around town
wearing a black patent leather cape
fashion comes first
she always said
ordinarily people live their lives in desperation
always the recipient of a sorry... try again
on this planet one girl thrives
she's got superpowers
and we're all so jealous of her
great scott
the news reporters exclaim
as she saves another kitten
from a night in the rain
laws of quantum physics
slowly bend to her will
advanced mechanics
thermodynamics
easier still
once played the lotto
she won
when she walks down the avenues
she passes by baltic
but boardwalk's hers
meter maids in hot pursuit
two shiny new quarters float up
to the top of her purse
she makes 47-second minute rice
she mixes her kool aid right in the glass
always picking the unlocked door
always knows what day they pick up the trash
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10. |
||||
sunday and the dryers are all out of order
needed something to do with all of those quarters
crossed the street and went to pinball pete's
heard they had two tetris machines
this girl trades me four quraters for 10 dimes
then she starts clearing four lines at a time
she's got the hands and the eyes
i'm gonna make her mine
though i've never been very good at video games
couldn't kill ganon
couldn't beat the mother brain
and of course she's a tough act to follow
800,000 points and she only spent a dollar
low as i get she's always lower
and i'm trying to last, not playing to score
i'm feeling like a square but i'll give it a whirl
you can laugh all you want
but i'm really in love with tetris girl
tetris girl
i know you've been played
but how do i get in the game
tetris girl
i had a lot of lines
but something always seems to get in the way
i saw her again just the other night
she knew who i was without looking up
the girl and i who will never hook up
she won't even be polite
she said i want some visine
i want some visine
i'll give you my love
if you give me some visine
i'd love to play like this all night
but i know that things won't stack up right
we have these short conversations
i might die just waiting for a long one
she's got the hands and she's got the moves
she swears that i've got nothing to prove
but i must have hit select
i've got no idea what happens next
and if you check the high schore screen
one through four reads a c i
number five says i heart u and that's mine
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11. |
Question Mark
03:11
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i guess i must not have enough
hardship in my life
i'll call you up for my daily fix
of mixed signals
i wouldn't feel right if not
for this question mark over my head
over my head
thought bubbles stand out from backgrounds
we don't check on backgrounds
i give up i'm just hanging out
in the grey areas
blurry lines
fuzzy definitions
here's the deal
first one who grows up
comes back
clues the other one in and says
i was right
all along
you were
completely wrong
i wanted us as a two headed monster
you should have known by now
gimme time to put my face on
come on
the whole town is out
and every time we're out on the town
i end up wanting to pull off your face
hearing john williams tunes as we face the crowd
i step in as surrogate boyfriend
once again it's me vs the sharkmen
i'm tired of playing this game
hey
we've already wasted too much wind
this game is playing me
and you're saying as of lately
i guess i have been bitter
hey babe
know what
that sounds familiar
coat hanger archway sheep herder tapdance ender hairpin turn drinking fountain thought bubble over my head bewildered seen in profile in cross section a passerby might remark on how i bear a close resemblance to a certain punctuation
i guess i must not have enough
hardship in my life
can you fix me up
with a question mark
grey areas
blurry lines
fuzzy definitions
i'll say it to you
you'll say it to me
we'll say it together on three:
i was right
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12. |
18 Weeks
05:24
|
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i hereby negate our twin burdens
of history shared and grievances owed
i've got too many taped up pictures of you
and too many acid etched markings on my telephone
i don't regret being a little unfair or unkind
in my portrait of you
so don't go calling asking me if i still care
i think you know
for awhile my nails took a beating
i went to movies by myself
almost every day
our friends are a newsletter about your life
i didn't subscribe but i keep getting it anyway
i know we were in deep but don't get the wrong idea
about my scrapbooks and albums
the pictures that i keep
i keep there less for reminiscing than to see if they will fade
after 18 weeks
i know i wasn't wrong
there's this other guy
and he' worse than i expected
after 18 weeks
i see you forgetting me
there's this other guy
even sooner than projected
it really sucks to be right all the time
this song is the song that i'm writing for you
i'll try to find the right words
try to find something that hurts
we'll see how much damage i can do
what can i say
what can i do
sometimes it just suits me to be cruel
when you know him as well as you know me
you won't love him either
when he knows you as well as i do
he won't love you either
after 18 weeks you knock me out
with a volley of words and you make your escape
after 18 weeks i'm just another guy
and he's the one that's perfect in every way
i hereby negate our twin burdens
of history shared and grievances owed
but you know you've got a lot of nerve
pulling yourself together when i'm still alone
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13. |
Pity Sex
03:11
|
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there's something irresistable
about a pretty girl with a shitty car
we're only now feeling the effects of reagan's policies
hey girl be camilla to my gonzo
i bet you didn't know that helen keller was a socialist
hey
you hated congo
wow
i hated congo
i too thought the monkeys looked robotic
do you think that i could get your number
pity sex
it was pity sex
you remind me of the girl that married andy kauffman
on taxi i mean it and i mean it as a compliment
you know what my sister's boyfriend's coworker
once knew this guy
who knew the guy
who drums for verve pipe
hey
you didn't really play mousetrap
wow
i didn't really play moustrap
i just set it up and set it off
so i could watch it catch the little guy
can i call you sometime
pity sex
it was pity sex
i couldn't help but notice that you walked in alone
it would be my pleasure to walk you home
could a girl like you
have pity
on a guy like me?
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